Tuesday, November 12, 2013

The Black Helicopters

Tuesday November 12 2013

They've been flying directly over us in this Owyhee desert for weeks now, day and night. The black helicopters.

Claude Dallas was an outlaw in the 80's who shot and killed 2 game wardens, and hid out in the Owyhee desert for some 15 months before he was caught. Maybe they're searching for another outlaw?

They're clearly doing something besides just flying. They've flown directly overhead way too many times for it to be a coincidence. Sometimes they fly high, sometimes low. Sometimes they fly slow, or fast, or they hover. Sometimes at night they use spotlights. Some might think they are black military helicopters.

I think not.

They are masquerading as military helicopters, but I know what they really are.

Paparazzi! You know how they fly over movie stars' houses, right? Here they are obviously spying on The Most Beautiful Horse On The Planet, having finally discovered where he lives, trying to catch him in some compromising position. Today two of them flew in a box directly over me. Then one flew back and forth, back and forth over me. Trying to figure out exactly which brown blob was TMBHOTP. I didn't let on which one he was.

Well, it won't happen anyway. Whatever Stormy does, he's beautiful, never compromising anything. Even first thing in the morning, without his makeup, he's beautiful. Even in his winter fat, which isn't quite there yet, he's beautiful. Even when he's rolling in the dirt, he's beautiful. Even when he's tried to scratch himself on the bushes, and has saltbush stickers in his tail, he's beautiful. Even when he's passed out in the poopy uneaten hay, he's beautiful.

So, the helicopters can fly and spy all they want: Stormy has been, is, always will be, in any position, The Most Beautiful Horse On The Planet.

And on a serious note with Veterans Day just past, I am so grateful I don't live in a war zone, where the constant sound of helicopters brings fear, not curiosity, where one expects accompanying machine gun fire or the explosions of bombs, and I'm grateful for those veterans who have, do, and will give their lives, in legitimate and even illegitimate wars, so I can live with my Most Beautiful Horse On The Planet.


  1. I'm afraid you and your herd have been discovered. Now you'll have to deal with movie star status for a while.

  2. You have black helicopters, we have fighter planes, which are pretty awesome to watch when they do their loopy-looping stuff.
    But I bet you are right, they are all paparazzi. The ones over here heard about the two amazing Irish horses living in the wilds of Provence and are trying to photograph them

  3. We see helicopters around here sometimes. It hadn't occurred to me that they might also be papparazi looking for the beautiful and famous, like my most beautiful horse, Mischief. IMHO, he could give Stormy some competition!

  4. Stormy needs a face mask sort of like the ones that Michael Jackson put on his kids. People are going to take photos and put them on the cover of the Enquirer if you aren't careful. Then you'll have tour buses coming with Japanese people and their cameras. Where will it end? Alas, beauty has its price, Merri!